A Day At The Spa

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=168 BGCOLOR="#000000" TEXT="#F7F7FF" background="002a11c3.png"> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Home Page"><U>HOME</U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id4.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Book Page"><U>BOOKS   </U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id6.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Articles"><U>ARTICLES</U></A></div> <bR> <div>  <A HREF="id7.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Tapes"><U>TAPES</U></A>   </div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id8.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Spiritual Warfare/Occult "><U>SPIRITUAL WARFARE, OCCULT   </U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id77.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Sexual Abuse Issues"><U>SEXUAL ABUSE ISSUES</U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id11.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Exposing the Darkness Seminar"><U>***EXPOSING THE DARKNESS SEMINAR***</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="mailto:greid@elp.rr.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:greid@elp.rr.com"><U> <img src="HTMLobj-851/aniGif.gif" border="0" align="bottom" width="67" height="50">  </U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#000000" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="37c1ff10.jpg" border=0 width="287" height="241" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>A Day At The Spa</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I've always struggled with my weight. I'm one of those people who look at a twinkie and gain weight. I'm not OBESE. Most people wouldn't think I'm really overweight. But I do. And, it fluctuates. In winter, I hibernate. I don't exercise. (Allright, I don't in spring and summer either.) I get lots of cookies and pies around Thanksgiving, and tons of Christmas fruitcakes. Unfortunately, unlike millions of people who find that fruitcakes are an excellent doorstop and also work well as a deadly weapon to heave at house burglars, I actually LIKE them. CRAVE them. My biggest weight gains occur just in time for little children to whisper, "Mommy, why isn't Santa wearing his red suit?"</B></div> <div> <B>    </B></div> <div> <B> </B></div> <div> <B>So every March, it's diet rampage time. Rabbit food fills my refrigerator the day following my final midnight munch of fruitcake. (I get a LOT of fruitcakes - sometimes this doesn't occur till late March.) In three or four months of near starvation during which time I hear voices and see angels, I have shed enough bulge to justify a growing number of sugar indulgences. So I never really reach my "ideal weight". By October, I'm drooling for a fruitcake fix.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Years ago, on the occasion of my annual ban-the-blimp crusade, I was unusually agitated by my aggressive waistline expansionism policy and unusually determined to actually DO something about it.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     So I joined a health spa. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I really meant business. Extreme conditions demand extreme measures! Attack them calories! Suck in that gut! This is WAR!!!</B></div> <div> <B>     Like General Patton headed for Italy, I put on my war gear, (tennies, sweatband and walkman), got all the essential battleplans (how many reps to do on what machines and I marched off to WAR!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     However, I changed the war plans of the sage and seasoned battle counselors, also known as "trainers". If 5 reps at 10 pounds was good, surely 25 reps at 30 pounds would turn the tide of this FatWar! (It'll SCARE the calories right off the Body Battlefield!) I doubled or tripled on every machine, gritting my teeth, sweating in torrents.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I finally finished, entering the shower and hot tub like a champion, throwing pitying glances at the weaker, less victorious weightlifters in the room. I felt so good when I left, I wondered what the big deal was about losing weight! G.Q., here I come! "Mr. Reid, a onetime fruitcake addict, will be speaking at the White House prayer breakfast on "How I beat the bulge through prayer and tripling my repetitions."</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     The next morning, I couldn't get out of bed. Hurt is such a lame word to describe how I felt. I felt for tire marks on my face. Then I remembered. Joe Atlas suddenly became Joe Bonehead. I crawled to the shower, and upon seeing my not-one-pound-thinner body in the mirror, I simply GAVE UP. Just like that. NOTHING was worth this pain! I dreamed of fruitcakes that night, and only visited the spa 3 times the rest of the year. To sit in the hot tub and dream of fruitcakes.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Several years later, I decided to try a new tactic. March came. The fruitcakes were all eaten. I put on my tennies, opened the front door, and I walked. For a big 10 minutes. Two days later, I did it again. After a while, 10 minutes became 15, 15 became 30.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I chucked the cookies. I bought some healthy food. (That REALLY scared my fat cells.) Ice cream was substituted with sherbet, then oranges. Popcorn was my only midnight indulgence. Slowly - painfully so - a pound dropped, then 2, and on it went.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I slip. I fail. But I get back up and on track.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I'll never make G.Q. But I feel good, and I can wear last year's jeans again, and get into them without a shoehorn.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Of all the struggles Christians face, discipline in spiritual things is the hardest. Developing scripture reading discipline seems like an endless battle for most of us, usually given a place on our New Year's resolution list. It's the same with prayer. So we feel guilty, get "determined" to enter the spiritual Weight Room. We buy 3 Bibles, 2 commentaries and a concordance and sit down and STUDY! We read until our minds are foggy and we forgot what we just read. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     The next day, we give up.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Just as I was doomed to fail by breaking my neck at the spa, so you will fail by making huge promises and overdone efforts to become Joe Christian after years of spiritual laziness. Physical muscles go into rebellious SHOCK when you expect them to act like Jack La Lane after treating them like Baby Huey for years. So do spiritual muscles.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Conditioning is the key to both - start slow - be consistent - build gradually. If you slip, you just start over.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Allright, you aren't going to read Genesis tonight. You may not get through 1 Corinthians 13. But anyone can read ONE verse a day, right? Commit to it for a week. Just one verse! Every day! If you don't, it's a sure sign you don't mean business. God simply isn't a priority for you. One verse a week - then soon, you'll start getting hungry and need more, then more...slowly, steadily - you're developing a spiritual habit that will last a lifetime.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I had one last lame argument about this distasteful idea of discipline in reading God's Word. I'll tell you what it was - and God's reply.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     "Lord, I don't WANT this to be a chore! If it's a discipline, it won't be SPONTANEOUS! And I do so very much want my relationship with you to be spontaneous!" (All the angels giggled here) The Lord said simply, "You have no discipline. FIRST get the discipline, then I'll MAKE it spontaneous. Not before."</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Yes, Sir.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Where are my walking shoes?</B></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id45.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Stray Cats"><U><B>CHAPTER ELEVEN - STRAY CATS</B></U></A></div> </td> </tr></table></body>