Obedience

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=168 BGCOLOR="#000000" TEXT="#F7F7FF" background="002a11c3.png"> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Home Page"><U>HOME</U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id4.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Book Page"><U>BOOKS   </U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id6.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Articles"><U>ARTICLES</U></A></div> <bR> <div>  <A HREF="id7.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Tapes"><U>TAPES</U></A>   </div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id8.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Spiritual Warfare/Occult "><U>SPIRITUAL WARFARE, OCCULT   </U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id77.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Sexual Abuse Issues"><U>SEXUAL ABUSE ISSUES</U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id11.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Exposing the Darkness Seminar"><U>***EXPOSING THE DARKNESS SEMINAR***</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="mailto:greid@elp.rr.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:greid@elp.rr.com"><U> <img src="HTMLobj-866/aniGif.gif" border="0" align="bottom" width="67" height="50">  </U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#000000" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="37f1bf40.jpg" border=0 width="283" height="244" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>Obedience</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>My senior year in High School found me most afternoons at the local coffee shop studying and drinking hot tea. Like all kids, I waited till mere hours before an assignment was due and did it in a rush. I liked this particular restaurant because it was pretty quiet, and because there were three waitresses there I absolutely loved. Izzy, Hazel and Flo were right out of Mel's Diner. They hated their skinflint boss, they were always complaining about their hours and pay, but they were always laughing, enjoying life. Izzy was a chain smoking little lady who had seen the raw side of life, and I loved her nicotine-baritone laugh. Flo was the blond one, not quite intact memory, slow to get jokes. I often brought a friend, Gary, to study. Somehow she couldn't ever get our names right. "Oh, it's Gary and Larry!", she'd announce to the others when we came in, then, quizzical look on her face, "No, that's not right, Gary and GEORGE!" And on it went till she got it straight.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     Hazel was the quiet one. There was so much depth. One day I talked to her about Jesus and found she was one of our own. From then on, we had a very special bond, and she'd ask me to pray for things and I'd ask her the same. She was sad, somehow - lonely - even though she was married with children. I hurt for her.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     For a year before I graduated and moved away, Flo, Izzy and Hazel were like second family, and they always had time to stop and talk when I went in. No matter how depressed or troubled I was, just being around them and hearing their jokes and cutting up always made me feel better.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     When I moved away from home, it was a bad, disobedient move. It took three months for me to break from the situation I was in and come home. I had learned a lot about disobedience in that time, and I was determined to hear God's voice in His Word and by His Spirit, and obey.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     My first test came within days of arriving home. One day I just could not get Hazel off my mind. "Lord, what is this?", I asked. "Go see Hazel", the Lord spoke plainly - just once. "I will - tomorrow", I replied, and rushed off to do some stupid, trivial thing with some friends. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     The next day I remembered, and I drove down to the coffee shop to obey the Lord. I would be so glad to see the ladies again! But only Izzy and Flo were working. They both came up and hugged me hard. It felt so good that they were glad to see me. Then, I noticed both of their eyes were bloodshot and wet. "Hazel killed herself last night, honey", Izzy said, and then broke down. I was devastated. Somewhere in the lonely night of this pain-filled woman's life, she decided there was no hope and took her own life. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     As I sat in the chapel three days later for Hazel's funeral, I was tormented. God told me. I disobeyed. Now she was gone. Maybe just seeing her and letting her know I cared could have given her the hope she needed to hang on just a little while longer. But I didn't. This was the harshest lesson in disobedience I would ever have.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>     I know I've been forgiven for my disobedience. And I believe I will see Hazel again someday. But somehow, I don't want to lose the hurt and pain of losing her and knowing it didn't have to be - if only I had obeyed. I want to feel that. I want to remember, to have it like a thorn in my shoe to keep me on the path of absolute obedience.</B></div> <div> <B>     </B></div> <div> <B>     When God tells us to do something, He means now and without reservation. I understand now His words, "Obedience is better than sacrifice." A man once said, "Half obedience is disobedience." God didn't tell me to see Hazel the day after He told me. It was to be NOW. The results of my disobedience were far greater than I could have known. I'm thankful for the lesson, and for the scripture, "There is forgiveness with You, that You may be feared." It's not that I fear punishment for disobeying, but that I understand that the great God who needs human vessels to carry out His work counts on us, trusts us, and to betray that trust is worse than punishment. It's wounding a loved friend. For all the Hazels to come, Lord, help me to obey Your slightest leading, pang of the heart to pray or specific direction, and help me do it without question, without delay.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>   Help me obey so I can serve You without REGRET.</B></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id169.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="No Easy Answers"><U><B>CHAPTER SEVENTEEN - NO EASY ANSWERS</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <B>                        </B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>